The other day, my friend Mom-NOS told me that her son Bud had had a rough go at school. His team had reported that he was severely dysregulated and that he had said some very concerning things during the day that were completely out of character for him.
Bud and my Brooke are similar kids. No two of our little snowflakes are ever the same, but upon reading what she’d written, I had a hunch. I was wary about making an assumption, but the scenario sounded eerily familiar. So I told her my thoughts.
I’m just going to throw this out there – please don’t feel like you have to respond; it’s just a thought.
Brooke is so reliant on scripts to communicate that very often the words that come out really don’t reflect reality – or at the very least reflect some skewed, often hyperbolic form of reality – but not remotely her intention. ie – when we got a call from school early in the year that they were concerned that she was seemingly having suicidal ideations when indeed she had said “You just want to see me flat on my back and kill myself’ which yes, many an autism mom would recognize from It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.
And, she tends to go into script-only mode when she’s not ‘present’.
Sooooo, not to minimize any of this IN THE LEAST – but perhaps to contextualize it a bit if it’s relevant.
Again, just thoughts based on my experience, so dismiss at will.
She wrote back later to say that she’d had the same thought and that she was composing an e-mail to Bud’s team to let them know.
And, by God did she ever write an e-mail. And thankfully, because she is who she is, she was gracious enough to share with each and every one of us. And holy hell, my friends, this is something we ALL need to read.
If you have a child who uses scripts in any way, shape or form, you NEED to read this. If you have a kid who gets dysregulated by change, you NEED to read this. If you teach or come into contact in any way with children like mine, I IMPLORE you to read this.
Thank you, MOM-NOS – for sharing your insights about your utterly fabulous kid with us. He is a wonder, and he is incredibly lucky to have you as his mom.